From the time this letter to Timothy was written until now (nearly 2,000 years later), our self-love has gotten progressively worse; with, I suppose, dips and rises along the way. In evil times self-love increased, and in times of revival it decreased. But overall, I think in our near 2,000-year time span, it has gotten much worse. Here are seven areas where we can see the progressive worsening of self-love—particularly in the last fifty or sixty years.

1. Social Media. When computers came out, then cell phones, and then all the different social media companies (like Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, TikTok, Snapchat, X, and Pinterest), people (mostly young people) sort of vanished from normal person to person communication, even from telephone conversations. They instead buried their heads and minds into social media technology. We will have to admit that many social media platforms are quite helpful in making yourself known and selling a product; but it doesn’t do much for your character. In fact, social media is all about building up your self-image. And in a strange way it tends to make people self-centered and will build up for them a pedestal for their own idolatry.  

2. Pornography. Pornography, in one form or another, has been around for a long time; and in the last fifty years or so it has exploded. It can be seen in books, magazines, and videos, anywhere on the internet and even in social media.

I think this is one of the most deceptive evils there is, because the devil tells us, and our flesh tells us that porn is such a loving act; and when we view it, and also act on it, we feel the love—we feel that we are loving ourselves. But when it is over we feel betrayed and guilty. And it is highly addictive (read 1 Corinthians 7:18-20).

3. Gluttony. Gluttony is overeating; but it is also eating only what tastes good to us, with no regard to what is good for the body. I heard one person, in all honesty, say, I eat only what tastes good to me, not what I think is healthy. Sometimes when I go grocery shopping, I notice what other people buy. I see some carts loaded down with mostly chips, cookies, soda pop, ice cream, and cakes. They have no vegetables (fresh or frozen) at all! I also have noticed that these people are quite obese. Now, I don’t mean to be judgmental. I’m just telling you what I see. 

Gluttony has always been a problem for most people, especially in rich countries. It was a big problem with the Roman Emperors—who were rich. But I think it is especially a problem with the rich countries of today—like America, that have grocery stores everywhere, and where people can buy whatever they desire. Many of us see no problem with buying and eating all that we desire—all that tastes good to us. But when we do, we are guilty of the evil of self-love.

Interestingly, when the bible talks about gluttony it puts it next to drunkenness. And its result is poverty (Prov. 23:20-21; Deut. 21:20). I suppose that is because those who are guilty of it eat and drink all their profit away. Also, in Philippians 3:19 and Galatians 5:16 we may notice that those who do not walk by the Spirit and are enemies of the cross, their god is their appetite. This gluttony is the evil of self-love.

4. The Decline of the Family. God created the family to be a blessing to each other and for love. But when sin came the family began to slowly break down, and the good and healthy love of self was corrupted into a selfish and self-centered love. I heard the other day that the average child rate in a family is now 1.5 children per family—an all-time low. In 1950 it was about 4.5, and a few centuries before that it was much higher. In fact, in the family of John Wesley, he had seven sisters and three brothers. Likewise, the family of Jonathan Edwards was also large. Then he and his wife also brought ten children into the world. Those days are pretty much gone. And what is the reason? I would say that part of it is selfishness. Certainly, the women do not want to go through the pain of childbirth, and for the damage of her figure. As a couple, they may think a large family is just too hard.

But there are other points of selfishness that cause the decline of the family. From 1950 to the present, divorce has increase drastically. Abortion is also on the incline. Bringing a life into the world is just too hard. All in all, because of self-love the family suffers.

5. Self-image. In these wicked days, because of self-love there is more emphasis on self-image. Never before has there been so many beauty creams, treatments and surgeries to make ourselves look beautiful and handsome. And there are countless weight-loss pills. And when those don’t work, we can always spend hundreds of dollars going to the gym. But most people will not stick to that.

Loving ourselves through trying to improve your image is a deadly trap. Sometimes, especially with the youth, it ends up in suicide—because it is very hard to keep up with all the beautiful people we see (in the glamor magazines). It is better, for the sake of your health to just maintain a good diet and a regular, short exercise program in your home. In the end, maintaining your spiritual health and your relationship with God is far better than worrying about your figure.

6. Entertainment. I think most of us these days work hard at trying to love ourselves through our favorite TV shows, the movies we watch and rewatch on DVD, and our favorite sports. This is an area of self-love that has really accelerated in the last seventy years—since we didn’t have television before then. What did people do with their time? This era of entertainment, for the most part, is plain and simple…idolatry!

7. What Professionals are saying. Most doctors and psychologists have been saying for years that self-love, no matter what kind, is good. In fact, they are saying that it is the first step to conquering most mental ills. Now, in some ways it is good—if it is from God’s Spirit. But when they start saying that you need to accept yourself with all your lustful practices, that is when you need to go elsewhere. Sin should never be accepted or practiced in the name of loving yourself.